The ‘Pan-India Popularity Rating Points (PPRP)’ are out. Believe it or
not, neither the irresistible and ostentatious stars from the world of
celluloid (of course I mean Bollywood or what else would world of
celluloid come to represent in Indian context- certainly not the films
of Ray?) nor the equally irresistible cricket demigods top the
ratings.
Politicians certainly not- how could you even make a reference to
politicians? Don’t you know they are the roots of all evils that
surround us? Sorry, I have to admit that I do suffer from occasional
strokes of Cerebral Memory Imbalance (CMI) and it was one of these
strokes that resulted in the production of this social blasphemy.
Politicians in India do not belong to us – the common men. They have
been nurtured and trained in a controlled anti-India environment in
highly-modern sea labs of Virginia by a bunch of NASA scientists and
Greg Chappel (Yup, that obnoxious Aussie who ruined the career of
Irphan Pathan who, but for his tutelage, would have become an
all-rounder six times better than Sir Garrifield Sobers). The entire
cost of this ‘mission’ was borne by Roosevelt, Churchil, Lord
Dolhousie, Queen Victoria (all of them were allowed to walk out of
their graves by a Christian god whom I last saw in a movie or a Door
Darshasn serial- I can’t recall exactly where...baba where is my
memory drink?)and ......Digvijay Singh (yes, that snobbish royal from
MP did collude with foreigners in this anti-Indian campaign...thank
you baba...courtesy the herbal drink, I can recollect everything now).
Now please forgive me for straying from the information I was to serve
you first as implied in the opening paragraph. But please don’t be
angry folks, I, fortunately or unfortunately (baba drink please), have
just joined media and therefore building on suspense and keeping
audience on tenterhooks saying plenty of things without meaning
anything before coming to the point (only when you think it’s time you
went home and took your wife out for dinner) are traits of my
profession.
Calm dowm...dn’t frown...without further ado, I must announce the name
of the winners of toppers in PPRP. They are a bunch of alpha-Indians
out on the road, street, ground observing fast onto death. They may
appear different with their gears but they have one common agenda- to
rid Bharat Mata or Mother India (I do not mean Nurgis certainly) of
corruption and satanic politicians. Some may be seen sporting saffron
robes while some may be spotted in plain white Gandhian outfits (even
the mom-boy duo who advertises Tide may be envious of their
whiteness). Chances are of also bumping into bush-shirt wearing or
sari-clad penance-figures.
They have been sent to the earth by the god himself who created
Bharat. I must add here that I’m not talking about the god who created
the earth. Bharat was constructed by that great god in such a manner
as it would be free of corruption and all kinds of moral decays and it
was the case with the country till these genetically-engineered
politicians descended here (thanks baba for another sip...did you use
shark’s fin while preparing it?)
I’m going out now as I’m unable to log in to my Facebook ID. I knew
politicians are behind this.....Have to sit on fast unto death till I
am allowed access to my ID...(ya Baba dn’t worry, I’v consumed eight
apples, six oranges, two bowls of porridge and one litter of cane
juice..wn’t have to worry for hunger till my demands are
met).......Want to join me?
The people are captivated to see someone playing the real opposition. Lack of representation over the years has made our country a failed state.
जवाब देंहटाएं